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Preparing for shared custody during the holidays

 Halloween is just over two weeks away. If you are going through a divorce or are having difficulty with a parent over parenting time, this may concern you as the holiday season will be here before you know it. The end of the year is particularly difficult because there are so many demands on children’s time. Between school plays, church productions and family gatherings, some kids will have busy schedule.

So how do parents who no longer have a relationship (especially those who can’t stand each other) manage the expectations that come with the holidays? This post will provide a few tips.

Have a summit – Try to get together with your ex for a cup of coffee to learn about their plans for the holidays. While this meeting may be as pleasant as an enema, it has the potential of setting a good foundation for sharing time during the holidays.

Gauge interest from family members – Find out where family gatherings will be so you can plan early. For those with family who live far away, this will be an opportunity to see how feasible it will be to have them come in for the holidays.

Remember the past holiday season – For example, if one parent (and their family) spent Thanksgiving with the child, perhaps a rotation is in order.

Learn your rights – This is especially important for unmarried parents without a parenting time order that details where the child will spend the holiday season. If no such order exists, having an agreement is critical.

Source:, Holiday season approach – What divorcing parents need to prepare for, October 8 2013

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