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The holidays may call for new traditions after divorce

Whether you asked for the divorce or not, you're going to feel it rather keenly when the holidays role around, especially if you have children. The holidays are often thought of as family time, and there has been a significant shift in your family. Even if it's been for the better, this means the holidays can be hard. Some experts suggest starting new traditions to help you during this time.

For one thing, if both you and your ex are still involved in the children's lives, new traditions are necessary just so you can both see them. Make sure you plan out when the children are going to be with each of you in advance. This way, there are no surprises. The last thing you want is for your spouse to show up and whisk the children away when you were planning on decorating the tree or going to visit their grandparents.

If your children are old enough, it's not a bad idea to ask them what they think. Let them join you and your spouse and plot out new traditions. This is the best way to make sure that everyone is happy with the arrangement.

Similarly, you may want to take traditions—like who gets to put the star on the tree—and give them to one of the children. Letting them be a part of it creates a fun, festive atmosphere where you're not thinking about how life is different.

While many traditions are group events, if you have multiple children, it's also important to plan some time to spend with each one individually. Be sure you connect with all of them and that no one feels left out.

As always, make sure you know your rights in Arkansas during the holiday season when it comes to custody and visitation.

Source: Huffington Post, "Starting New Holiday Traditions After a Divorce," Gail Gross, accessed Oct. 14, 2015

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